**SPOILERS**
DO NOT READ FURTHER IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THE MOVIE
**FINAL SPOILER WARNING**
I went in with high expectations.
I was very disappointed.
All the money is on the screen, and the special effects
are fine...but man...what a way to create an ultimately
illogical, contradictory, and downright stupid storyline.
Here are just a few spoilers, the first two silly nit-pic
stuff:
* planet-sized close-ups of Sue Storm's face, ridiculously
revealing her fake blue contact lenses, which change color
from blue, to green, to purple depending on the lighting.
And don't get me started on the caucasian-pale-pancake
that is trowled onto her face and the circus clown amount
of eye-liner etc. caked around her peepers.
* and the silver surfer without his silvery powers...have you
ever seen a middle-aged drag queen without make-up and a
wig? big Big BIG miscalculation on his facial prostheses
at the end of the movie.
* and the essential character and the nature of the Silver
Surfer himself (itself). In the comic books he is a brave noble
character who sacrificed his soul to save his home planet
and his lover.
Here, he's apparently a cowardly schmuck who sacrificed
his freedom and his integrity to save his planet, but some
how, for some reason, FINALLY finds his missing testicles
by the end of the movie and commits an act of heroism
(that he has apparently been technically capable of for
many years but just too cowardly to commit to) that saves
the day, frees him from his horrific slavery, and saves the
lives and existence of millions of future worlds.
In the comic books the Surfer's powers are that of a flea
in comparison to his master Galactus, hence, why his
eventual betrayel of his master is such an act of hubris,
bravery, madness, and desparation.
In this movie, his ultimate act is inexplicable, implying that
throughout the death of 300 past worlds/civilizations, he
always had the power to destroy the mighty world-devourer,
and all it would have taken was the sacrifice of himself.
In short, the makers of FF-II have taken one of the coolest
characters in comic book history, and neutered his soul.
Nuff said.
Comic Book Geek stuff:
1) Cloud Galactus vs. Giant Humanoid Galactus - this
controversy has been raging on the internet for a year.
Suffice it to say I ultimately have no problem with
the current incarnation of the world-devourer, as
on-screen it/he looks very very scary.
2) Multi-powered Human Torch, obviously inspired by
the comic book storyline where Dr. Doom clones himself
(to create an heir) and infuses said offspring with the
power of all four of the fantastics, thus creating a
smackdown of graphic novel proportions.
3) The Fantasticar - Meh.
4) Cute almost inaudible verbal reference to GALAXY QUEST's
Beryllium sphere (something Reed needs to power an invention).
Mike out
This post was last modified: 06-16-2007, 01:30 PM by Mike Hanson.