Last night I played me pal Lloyd a game of chess. Played for our usual million, of course. The game was either man's victory. But Lloyd the Lawyer started talkin' trash. "Mike, I see a mate in 3!" I looked at the board and pondered deeply... No way. I had too much power around me king. And Lloyd couldn't beat my cunning black bishop and my well-positioned knight to put the final cruel hurt down.

"Lloyd, my brother, I don't see it. How 'bout we bet another million?"
"Yes!"
His attack went nowhere. The game devolved into a killing match.
"Yo, Lloyd...it ain't wise to have your king and queen on the same clear rank when I got my rooks doubled."
"JESUS FUCK SHIT!"
"Pay me when you can, my brother..."

I am now six large large to the good with this woodpusher!