Also known as..."Alien vs. Predator II?" "Predator IV?" "Alien VI?" Ouch, it boggles the mind!
Well, I just saw the second installment of this unholy fanboy hybrid of two successful film franchises. And what do I want to say about it? Unoriginal, unimaginative, and ridiculously derivative of every previous flick in these bridged realities. The human characters are cardboard cutouts of the thinnest material. Their inevitable rising body count barely ruffles a feather as the so-called plot ensues.
Things pick up immediately from the end of the previous Alien vs. Predator flick as the small and plot-friendly remote town of Crested Butte, Colorado undergoes an explosion of Alien births that rivals the beginning of the post-1945 American baby boom. And standing tall to them all is one badass Predator Chieftain.
Several bloody mini battle set pieces ensue, with all of it ending in a Xeno-a-Xeno between Chieftain Predator and hybrid PredAlien on a hospital rooftop...and all of it feels just so damn pointless.
And the end of the flick itself? More derivative of the much more original RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD than anything else.
Will there be a AvP III? Maybe not. This flick does not end with a cliffhanger like it's predecessor. Let's hope the studio takes a hint and puts this monstrosity to its final rest.
My longer review can be read in my "blog" at my website.
I give "ALIEN VS. PREDATOR: REQUIEM," TWO-AND-ONE-HALF out of five cans of diet cherry vanilla Dr. Pepper.
Mike out
Well, I just saw the second installment of this unholy fanboy hybrid of two successful film franchises. And what do I want to say about it? Unoriginal, unimaginative, and ridiculously derivative of every previous flick in these bridged realities. The human characters are cardboard cutouts of the thinnest material. Their inevitable rising body count barely ruffles a feather as the so-called plot ensues.
Things pick up immediately from the end of the previous Alien vs. Predator flick as the small and plot-friendly remote town of Crested Butte, Colorado undergoes an explosion of Alien births that rivals the beginning of the post-1945 American baby boom. And standing tall to them all is one badass Predator Chieftain.
Several bloody mini battle set pieces ensue, with all of it ending in a Xeno-a-Xeno between Chieftain Predator and hybrid PredAlien on a hospital rooftop...and all of it feels just so damn pointless.
And the end of the flick itself? More derivative of the much more original RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD than anything else.
Will there be a AvP III? Maybe not. This flick does not end with a cliffhanger like it's predecessor. Let's hope the studio takes a hint and puts this monstrosity to its final rest.
My longer review can be read in my "blog" at my website.
I give "ALIEN VS. PREDATOR: REQUIEM," TWO-AND-ONE-HALF out of five cans of diet cherry vanilla Dr. Pepper.
Mike out
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]MICHAEL H. HANSON
https://www.facebook.com/michael.h.hanson.3
http://www.copperdogpublishing.com
Today I saw "AvP:R". It was not good. You know what was bad? It was not scary at all. It was not thrilling at all.
When I first saw "Alien"(1978) in a theatre, I felt many scary moments. Maybe because I was a kid.
After that, I saw Aliens, Alien3, Alien4, Predator, Predator 2. I like Aliens and two Predator movies.
One problem is I became accustomed to seeing H.R. Gigar's Alien. The are not scary any more.
I felt human is scary than Aliens and Predator at the last sequences. To exterminate Aliens, they dropped bombs. They killed Aliens and town people.
I guess Predators will never visit to Earth. "Earth is very dangerous planet. Human kill their comrades! What a savages!"
When I first saw "Alien"(1978) in a theatre, I felt many scary moments. Maybe because I was a kid.
After that, I saw Aliens, Alien3, Alien4, Predator, Predator 2. I like Aliens and two Predator movies.
One problem is I became accustomed to seeing H.R. Gigar's Alien. The are not scary any more.
[SIZE="3"]* * * * * Spoilers * * * * *[/SIZE]
I felt human is scary than Aliens and Predator at the last sequences. To exterminate Aliens, they dropped bombs. They killed Aliens and town people.
I guess Predators will never visit to Earth. "Earth is very dangerous planet. Human kill their comrades! What a savages!"
one word...
whaaaaaaatttt?????
this movie was beyond pointless. now Aliens can become hybridized? and since when can they start reproducing like crazy without a Queen? seems the gestational period on lil chest thumpers has significantly dropped, too. WTH was the thing about the babies??????
there's a loose Alien on a Predator ship and only ONE goes off to earth to hunt? esp when he can see something is very wrong with the looks of the thing. then the Predator is making sure to eliminate evidence (the blue stuff on all bodies) but hangs the deputy's sinned body up a tree???? wuh???
No one notices a Predator ship crash land? esp that close to a nuclear power plant? had to love that too- let's throw in some scary dark woods, ooo oo ooo now we need sewers, yeah! sewers and there should be a nuclear power plant too and and and and- it looked like a 5 year old wrote it. the homeless guy in the sewer cared more about his dog than the ex military thanks for the yellow ribbons round the old oak tree wife showed her Alien eaten husband.
it jumped all over the place and had the attention span of a labrador retriever on smack.
SUCKED. SUCKED. SUCKED.
did I mention it SUCKED?
whaaaaaaatttt?????
this movie was beyond pointless. now Aliens can become hybridized? and since when can they start reproducing like crazy without a Queen? seems the gestational period on lil chest thumpers has significantly dropped, too. WTH was the thing about the babies??????
there's a loose Alien on a Predator ship and only ONE goes off to earth to hunt? esp when he can see something is very wrong with the looks of the thing. then the Predator is making sure to eliminate evidence (the blue stuff on all bodies) but hangs the deputy's sinned body up a tree???? wuh???
No one notices a Predator ship crash land? esp that close to a nuclear power plant? had to love that too- let's throw in some scary dark woods, ooo oo ooo now we need sewers, yeah! sewers and there should be a nuclear power plant too and and and and- it looked like a 5 year old wrote it. the homeless guy in the sewer cared more about his dog than the ex military thanks for the yellow ribbons round the old oak tree wife showed her Alien eaten husband.
it jumped all over the place and had the attention span of a labrador retriever on smack.
SUCKED. SUCKED. SUCKED.
did I mention it SUCKED?
Black Knight American Akitas
http://www.blackknightakitas.com
KYFHO Racing Team
"Don't force me to release him"...Harbingers
Keeters kick Otherness butt!
BK Akitas Wrote:one word...
whaaaaaaatttt?????
this movie was beyond pointless. now Aliens can become hybridized? and since when can they start reproducing like crazy without a Queen? seems the gestational period on lil chest thumpers has significantly dropped, too. WTH was the thing about the babies??????
there's a loose Alien on a Predator ship and only ONE goes off to earth to hunt? esp when he can see something is very wrong with the looks of the thing. then the Predator is making sure to eliminate evidence (the blue stuff on all bodies) but hangs the deputy's sinned body up a tree???? wuh???
No one notices a Predator ship crash land? esp that close to a nuclear power plant? had to love that too- let's throw in some scary dark woods, ooo oo ooo now we need sewers, yeah! sewers and there should be a nuclear power plant too and and and and- it looked like a 5 year old wrote it. the homeless guy in the sewer cared more about his dog than the ex military thanks for the yellow ribbons round the old oak tree wife showed her Alien eaten husband.
it jumped all over the place and had the attention span of a labrador retriever on smack.
SUCKED. SUCKED. SUCKED.
did I mention it SUCKED?
SUCKED....sure, this movie sucked into sewer.
BK Akitas Wrote:one word...
whaaaaaaatttt?????
this movie was beyond pointless. now Aliens can become hybridized? and since when can they start reproducing like crazy without a Queen? seems the gestational period on lil chest thumpers has significantly dropped, too. WTH was the thing about the babies??????
there's a loose Alien on a Predator ship and only ONE goes off to earth to hunt? esp when he can see something is very wrong with the looks of the thing. then the Predator is making sure to eliminate evidence (the blue stuff on all bodies) but hangs the deputy's sinned body up a tree???? wuh???
No one notices a Predator ship crash land? esp that close to a nuclear power plant? had to love that too- let's throw in some scary dark woods, ooo oo ooo now we need sewers, yeah! sewers and there should be a nuclear power plant too and and and and- it looked like a 5 year old wrote it. the homeless guy in the sewer cared more about his dog than the ex military thanks for the yellow ribbons round the old oak tree wife showed her Alien eaten husband.
it jumped all over the place and had the attention span of a labrador retriever on smack.
SUCKED. SUCKED. SUCKED.
did I mention it SUCKED?
So what are you saying? That is movie sucks??
Major K
"He guards the sleep of his pauper master as if he were a Prince." George Graham Vest
"We are alone, absolutely alone on this chance planet: and, amid all the forms of life that surround us, not one, excepting the dog, has made an alliance with us." - Maurice Maeterlinck
yeah, you're feeling me. the only way it could have sucked worse is if a certain director who shall remain nameless to keep from giving him more power and turning his evil gaze in this direction had directed. direct, aren't I?
maybe we should subtitle this DUDE WHERE'S MY PREDATORS?
s-u-c-k-e-d beyond the telling of it.
what sucks the worst is I needed some decent entertainment to take my mind off other things. got some movie passes for christmas, figured a gory little body count might cheer me up. nope! couldn't even enjoy the popcorn (though that wasn't entirely the movie's fault, think I might have a touch of the flu)
maybe we should subtitle this DUDE WHERE'S MY PREDATORS?
s-u-c-k-e-d beyond the telling of it.
what sucks the worst is I needed some decent entertainment to take my mind off other things. got some movie passes for christmas, figured a gory little body count might cheer me up. nope! couldn't even enjoy the popcorn (though that wasn't entirely the movie's fault, think I might have a touch of the flu)
Black Knight American Akitas
http://www.blackknightakitas.com
KYFHO Racing Team
"Don't force me to release him"...Harbingers
Keeters kick Otherness butt!
The first AVP movie sucked SO BAD, that I honestly cannot fathom why anyone expected this one not to.... or why they bothered to spend money on it.
..... but that's just me. :p
..... but that's just me. :p
The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. ... The piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of our frightful position therein, that we shall either go mad from the revelation or flee from the light into the peace and safety of a new dark age.
~ Howard Phillips Lovecraft
BK Akitas Wrote:one word...
whaaaaaaatttt?????
this movie was beyond pointless. now Aliens can become hybridized? and since when can they start reproducing like crazy without a Queen? seems the gestational period on lil chest thumpers has significantly dropped, too. WTH was the thing about the babies??????
there's a loose Alien on a Predator ship and only ONE goes off to earth to hunt? esp when he can see something is very wrong with the looks of the thing. then the Predator is making sure to eliminate evidence (the blue stuff on all bodies) but hangs the deputy's sinned body up a tree???? wuh???
No one notices a Predator ship crash land? esp that close to a nuclear power plant? had to love that too- let's throw in some scary dark woods, ooo oo ooo now we need sewers, yeah! sewers and there should be a nuclear power plant too and and and and- it looked like a 5 year old wrote it. the homeless guy in the sewer cared more about his dog than the ex military thanks for the yellow ribbons round the old oak tree wife showed her Alien eaten husband.
it jumped all over the place and had the attention span of a labrador retriever on smack.
SUCKED. SUCKED. SUCKED.
did I mention it SUCKED?
And don't forget the teenagers with raging hormones that had nothing to do with the story, but what did? townfolk just fodder for the creatures from outer space; why bother giving them names or personalities? didn't play by the rules set up in the original alien series. hybrid, indeed?! timeline between predator and alien movies all tangled as well. where am I? bogie a blunt if you want to enjoy this movie, but you'll need ritalin to understand it.
AC
P.S. That was fun. BK, you've got the most beautiful stream of consciousness writing I've seen since James Joyce. You made my day.
