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+--- Thread: This may sound like sour grapes (/thread-2032.html)
This may sound like sour grapes - KRW - 11-20-2006
Sourdoughs Wrote:Thanks for the other "RJ Dilema" entries, folks! I'm loving reading them!
Dave: Wonderful! Very RJ like ending.
BritFan: Very fun! I liked the insiders use of Mr Al Roams and Mr Donato.
AsMoral: Damn funny! I knew it was going somewhere like that, but great clincher!
Keep them coming! I didn't enter one or I'd have posted it - you're all more clever than I!
-MarcC
You didn't like mine?
This may sound like sour grapes - webby - 11-20-2006
AsMoral Wrote:Jack answered the phone on the third ring.
Beside him on the couch Gia sits with her knees pulled to her chest gnawing nervously on her fingernail.
On the television screen the Creature from the Black Lagoon is seductively swimming below and parallel with the films female lead.
“Hello,” Jack says quietly into the phone.
“Put Gia on the phone,” the voice replies ominously, because it is more frightening that way.
“May I ask who…”
“It’s private, this is her number, her phone now kindly put her on.”
Jack pulled the phone from his ear and glanced at the handset before passing it off to Gia with a shrug. “For you.”
Gia glanced at her watch; she didn’t know who would be calling so late. “Hello,” she said.
“I believe we had a deal…we gave you the money under the condition we’d get it back.”
Gia’s skin blanched. In the glow of the flickering screen she seemed almost transparent.
“What is it?” Jack said noticing Gia’s change in demeanor.
On the phone the gentleman continued. “Did you think we wouldn’t find you?”
“It’s not that,” Gia tried to reply.
“Did you think that we didn’t have ways. You can’t escape us.”
“I didn’t mean…I had every intention…”
“Intentions don’t satisfy your debt.”
“I just don’t have the…” She glances at Jack and turns away, she hopes she can hide her shame from him.
“We have your number now, don’t try anything stupid. If you run we’ll find you. And don’t think you can get away with writing us off…that is impossible and will be a huge mistake.”
“I’ll try to get it to you, just don’t tell anyone about this…I never meant to let it go this long…”
“You have one week…” The line went dead.
Jack took the phone from the obviously shaken woman in his life. “Who was that?”
Gia shook her head, tears filled her eyes and threatened to spill onto her cheeks. “No one Jack…not anything you can help me with.”
“How can you say that…I’m repairman Jack…I can fix anything.”
“No, this will put you in deeper, to a place so dark and desolate it will make the Otherness look like Sunday School.”
“I can help you Gia. I’ve helped you before. I’ll even do it for free this time.”
“Oh Jack, this is different.”
“Just tell me who it was Gia!” Jack raised his voice, he was scared seeing the woman he loved in such turmoil.
Gia lowered her head into her hands and cried out. “It was EdFinancial Jack! I’ve defaulted on my student loans!”
“Oh shit.” Jack sat silently for a moment. “You may be right…I don’t see anyway of getting out of this one.”
_____________________________________________
Author's Note: The change in tense was deliberate, adding mystery and drama to the story. I can't believe this didn't win.
______________________________________________
You really had me going there...I can't believe it didn't win either. No one can escape student loan collectors!
This may sound like sour grapes - KRW - 11-20-2006
AsMoral Wrote:Jack answered the phone on the third ring.
Beside him on the couch Gia sits with her knees pulled to her chest gnawing nervously on her fingernail.
On the television screen the Creature from the Black Lagoon is seductively swimming below and parallel with the films female lead.
“Hello,” Jack says quietly into the phone.
“Put Gia on the phone,” the voice replies ominously, because it is more frightening that way.
“May I ask who…”
“It’s private, this is her number, her phone now kindly put her on.”
Jack pulled the phone from his ear and glanced at the handset before passing it off to Gia with a shrug. “For you.”
Gia glanced at her watch; she didn’t know who would be calling so late. “Hello,” she said.
“I believe we had a deal…we gave you the money under the condition we’d get it back.”
Gia’s skin blanched. In the glow of the flickering screen she seemed almost transparent.
“What is it?” Jack said noticing Gia’s change in demeanor.
On the phone the gentleman continued. “Did you think we wouldn’t find you?”
“It’s not that,” Gia tried to reply.
“Did you think that we didn’t have ways. You can’t escape us.”
“I didn’t mean…I had every intention…”
“Intentions don’t satisfy your debt.”
“I just don’t have the…” She glances at Jack and turns away, she hopes she can hide her shame from him.
“We have your number now, don’t try anything stupid. If you run we’ll find you. And don’t think you can get away with writing us off…that is impossible and will be a huge mistake.”
“I’ll try to get it to you, just don’t tell anyone about this…I never meant to let it go this long…”
“You have one week…” The line went dead.
Jack took the phone from the obviously shaken woman in his life. “Who was that?”
Gia shook her head, tears filled her eyes and threatened to spill onto her cheeks. “No one Jack…not anything you can help me with.”
“How can you say that…I’m repairman Jack…I can fix anything.”
“No, this will put you in deeper, to a place so dark and desolate it will make the Otherness look like Sunday School.”
“I can help you Gia. I’ve helped you before. I’ll even do it for free this time.”
“Oh Jack, this is different.”
“Just tell me who it was Gia!” Jack raised his voice, he was scared seeing the woman he loved in such turmoil.
Gia lowered her head into her hands and cried out. “It was EdFinancial Jack! I’ve defaulted on my student loans!”
“Oh shit.” Jack sat silently for a moment. “You may be right…I don’t see anyway of getting out of this one.”
_____________________________________________
Author's Note: The change in tense was deliberate, adding mystery and drama to the story. I can't believe this didn't win.
______________________________________________
That's great!! You could have also used the IRS and back taxes and watch Jack have a heart attack!
This may sound like sour grapes - Sourdoughs - 11-20-2006
KRW Wrote:You didn't like mine?
Sorry, KRW, I think I missed it.
Is it in this thread? If so, what page? Maybe I perused too quickly...
This may sound like sour grapes - Scott Hajek - 11-20-2006
WR.PARK Wrote:The answer to your question, Joe, is NO! And my further recommendation is that you run as fast as you can back to the Turkish bath and take a much-needed dunk. But you had better stick your fingers in your ears so the water doesn't rush in, or you might never surface. And what a loss that would be.
And I told you in my last message how and why I reacted. You can read into it anything you want. Soap yourself real good!
I'm really starting to like this guy!!
Keep up the great jabs at Mr. Sensitivity, they're downright hilarious!
This may sound like sour grapes - KRW - 11-20-2006
Sourdoughs Wrote:Sorry, KRW, I think I missed it.
Mine's short, I didn't write it out, it was just a scenario.
We had two serial killers in Phoenix this last summer and it had me wondering what Jack would do faced with one. So I thought Julio could come to Jack after the "Face lift Killer" (Faces) had killed his sister. It involves the Otherness and makes another connection in FPW's books. Since "Faces" was left open at the end, and it happens during Jacks time line leading up to "Nightworld", it would make it feasible.
This may sound like sour grapes - Ken Valentine - 11-20-2006
law dawg Wrote:Really? I didn't know that. I'm not a a technician when it comes to guns. I look at them as tools in a toolbox. I'm much better in the tactics part of the equation. I have a very good friend who is always experiments with guns, etc. Me, just hand me the tool and let me loose. As for you gunsmiths, I've always admired your knowledge and ability. Just not enough to get off my lazy butt and learn myself....
Well law dawg, unless you're really interested in it, and want to get into it in a big way, it's probably best to give it a pass. Because once you get started, it gets very expensive and time consuming. Not to discourage you, but to do it well takes a lot of fairly expensive tooling and a tremendous amount of mechanical knowledge. Not to mention patience.
Quote:I'm 47,000 words into the first one. I just started the second (about 3,000 words or so). You'll like the second one - it shows some of how we don't learn our lessons and how the same people who got us into trouble in the first place continue to be employed if not promoted.
The first one sounds interesting, but you're right about the second one -- it sounds absolutely intriguing.
Quote:Its hard not to like FPW. He is very real and likes good beer. What's the down side?
He's what we call "good people."
Ken V.
This may sound like sour grapes - Dave - 11-21-2006
Lisa Wrote:I had a dream about Dave last night. The rest of you guest starred, popping into the dream now and then. Unfortunately I can't remember what the heck the dream was about except for hanging out with Dave. There was some "plot"... probably it was a GU. Hmmm.I'm blushing!
Lisa
Dave
This may sound like sour grapes - Dave - 11-21-2006
Tony, your story put everything in perspective, brilliant. I'm enjoying everyone elses too, some good ideas in this group (and nice to see the Brits represent!).
Dave
This may sound like sour grapes - NewYorkjoe - 11-21-2006
WR.PARK Wrote:NYJ: I've visited West Virginia numerous times throughout my career and have always enjoyed the association and company of all those I've met--and up until now had always believed the hillbilly sterotype alleged by social-bigots to be unfair and untrue. But after reading your pompous rhetoric--in your case I'd make an exception.
I grew up a couple blocks away from Gia's townhouse in Sutton Square; my neighborhood was called Sutton Place; hence my nom-de-post.
My career in the Intelligence Community requires me to work in D.C. and Northern Virginia. The Eastern Panhandle of West Virginia has so many commuters to the D.C area now that it is now considered part of the D.C. Metro area. I moved there from the Maryland suburbs of D.C. because my wife and I wanted to be able to buy a house with some land without resorting to a mortgage, owning it free and clear. By keeping my financial obligations to a minimum, it is easier to keep and maintain a high-level security clearance. Does that satisfy?
BTW, the word you were searching for is "stereotype," and the most interesting thing about stereotypes is that while they may be exaggerated, they are based on some semblance of fact. Shall we discuss the stereotypes of the advertising profession now?
Since your 42 years' experience in advertising somehow entitles you to advise FPW on how to run a contest, can we assume that since your career probably included representing prescription or over-the-counter medicine clients that we can anticipate some free medical advice? Can't wait!
If you truly expect me to believe that in all your 42 years' advertising career you NEVER worked for a firm representing tobacco interests, then you must believe me more credulous than I really am. Also, I admit I was being facetious when I claimed to have written copy for an advertising firm. The closest I ever got to that was designing and writing brochures for aerospace companies detailing their product improvements (A-10 Lightning II aka Warthog, AV-8B Harrier, and the Close-In Weapons System for the Navy, called the Sea-Whiz (CIWS)). It was merely a humorous device on my part, shame it struck such a sensitive nerve.
With regard to your previous suggestion of "diving" into a Turkish bath, you should realize that Turkish baths involve steam rather than water. Now, if YOU were to dive into one, you might come up with something you might not relish (or, who knows, maybe you would!).
I congratulate you on making a memorable and unique first impression here on the board. I expect your subsequent posts will also provide amusing diversion.