Mike Hanson Wrote:You are NOT going to believe this!

I was in Wal*Mart today and all of a sudden two
huge guys came up to me and asked me why I
took that bottle of cologne. I don't even use
cologne! What cologne were they even talking
about?

They searched my cart and asked to search my
pockets. I told them, "hell no! WTF? I didn't steal
any frigging cologne." They told me I had to go
into the back and wait until the cops came and
they would have a police officer search and pat
me down.

They wouldn't take "no" for an answer (I'm a
pretty hefty guy but these yokels looked like
AFL linebackers), and so I walked to the back
room.

It was a small room filled with hangers and old
metal shelves. They told me to wait in there until
the cops came, then they left. I looked up and
saw a medium sized window that was easy to open.

I kid you not, I pulled a chair over under it and stood
up and opened the window. I reached and pulled myself
up and almost out when suddenly...a guy came back
in and grabbed hold of my leg and started pulling it
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
JUST LIKE I'M PULLING YOURS!!!!!!!

BAH HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Sorry. Lost my mind for a moment there... :o

Mike Hanson Wrote:You are NOT going to believe this!

I was in Wal*Mart today and all of a sudden two
huge guys came up to me and asked me why I
took that bottle of cologne. I don't even use
cologne! What cologne were they even talking
about?

They searched my cart and asked to search my
pockets. I told them, "hell no! WTF? I didn't steal
any frigging cologne." They told me I had to go
into the back and wait until the cops came and
they would have a police officer search and pat
me down.

They wouldn't take "no" for an answer (I'm a
pretty hefty guy but these yokels looked like
AFL linebackers), and so I walked to the back
of the store with them.

It was a small room filled with hangers and old
metal shelves. They told me to wait in there until
the cops came, then they left. I looked up and
saw a medium sized window that was easy to open.

I kid you not, I pulled a chair over under it and stood
up and opened the window. I reached and pulled myself
up and almost out when suddenly...a guy came back
in and grabbed hold of my leg and started pulling it
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
JUST LIKE I'M PULLING YOURS!!!!!!!

BAH HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Sorry. Lost my mind for a moment there...

p.s. I stole this from a friend at Zoetrope.com...she says she first heard
it from a boyfriend back in the early 1970's (though I think he may have
used Sears or Woolworths as the setting for this bit of hijinx).

Mike Hanson Wrote:You are NOT going to believe this!

I was in Wal*Mart today and all of a sudden two
huge guys came up to me and asked me why I
took that bottle of cologne. I don't even use
cologne! What cologne were they even talking
about?

They searched my cart and asked to search my
pockets. I told them, "hell no! WTF? I didn't steal
any frigging cologne." They told me I had to go
into the back and wait until the cops came and
they would have a police officer search and pat
me down.

They wouldn't take "no" for an answer (I'm a
pretty hefty guy but these yokels looked like
AFL linebackers), and so I walked to the back
of the store with them.

It was a small room filled with hangers and old
metal shelves. They told me to wait in there until
the cops came, then they left. I looked up and
saw a medium sized window that was easy to open.

I kid you not, I pulled a chair over under it and stood
up and opened the window. I reached and pulled myself
up and almost out when suddenly...a guy came back
in and grabbed hold of my leg and started pulling it
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
JUST LIKE I'M PULLING YOURS!!!!!!!

BAH HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Sorry. Lost my mind for a moment there...

p.s. I stole this from a friend at Zoetrope.com...she says she first heard
it from a boyfriend back in the early 1970's (though I think he may have
used Sears or Woolworths as the setting for this bit of hijinx).

Bluesman Mike Lindner Wrote:Know what you're saying, Mike. Had the same situation back in Mineola. The two brutes tried to drag me backstage too, but a little old lady shouted, "He's just a little four-year old boy! I'm calling the cops!"

Thank you, little old lady! The brutes hesitated just long enough for me to get my electron knife and energy pistol into play.

But Jeez...the paperwork I had to fill out later.:mad:..

phoenix rising Wrote:We must have been shopping from the same mail order catalouge....

Legion Wrote:And here i was ready to tell you that you had a major lawsuit for defamation of character on your hands and walmart woulda settled outta court for a hefty sum. Oh well. Kinda makes you wanna steal some cologne, huh?