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Films you can't bear - Lisa - 05-30-2005
Maggers mentioned this on another thread and I thought it was worth pursuing. In her words:
Maggers Wrote:A films-that-I-could-not-bear-list would be movies that I acknowledge are well done, well directed, perhaps even very well acted and written, but just did not click with me- in a big way.
Here's my list:
1. THE MATRIX. That's right, I said THE MATRIX. A movie that managed to be boring, confusing, pretentious, corny, embarrassing, and highly fucking unlikely--all at the same time.
2. THE ENGLISH PATIENT. I was actually angry that I sat through the whole thing. Dull and duller.
3. AFFLICTION. Nothing "wrong" with this one. Acting, writing, directing are all excellent. But it is deliberate, disturbing, and harrowlingly realistic. So much so that it ceases to be entertainment and becomes difficult or impossible to watch more than once.
4. TITANIC. "Rose!" "Jack!" "Rose!" "Jack!"
5. MOULIN ROUGE. This film gave me motion sickness. I'm not kidding.
6. MEET JOE BLACK. I almost killed myself after I watched this, just so I wouldn't have to "meet Joe Black" before I die. Most boring romance EVER.
7. FALLEN. Way overrated. All the plot elements were done before and better. And the ending is dumb.
8. DANGEROUS LIAISONS. I just can't get into John Malkovich and Glenn Close as desirable lovers. Sorry.
9. STEPMOM. Why does anyone like this movie? I don't understaaaaaaaaaand. (That was in my best "stepwhine" voice.)
10. THE PILLOW BOOK. Huh? Wha?? Ummmm. Peter Greenaway is a weirdo.
Lisa
Films you can't bear - jimbow8 - 05-30-2005
I like/love several of those, but I am reminded of the Seinfeld episode about The English Patient. Elaine is so right-on about that movie.
Quote:[Movie Theatre]
Peterman and Elaine are still in front of The English Patient. Peterman
stares, enraptured, at the screen. Elaine is totally frantic with boredom.
PETERMAN: Elaine, I hope you're watching the clothes, because I can't take my
eyes off the passion.
ELAINE: (quiet vehemence) Oh. No. I can't do this any more. I can't. It's too
long. (to the screen) Quit telling your stupid story, about the stupid
desert, and just die already! (louder) Die!!
The other movie patrons turn and shush Elaine, who sits back in her seat.
PETERMAN: (surprised) Elaine. You don't like the movie?
ELAINE: (shouts) I hate it!!
CROWD: Shh!
ELAINE: (shouts) Oh, go to hell!!
PETERMAN: (quietly) Well, why didn't you say so in the first place? You're
fired.
ELAINE: (grabbing her bag and coat) Great. I'll wait for you outside.
-----------------------------
As I've said before: Temple of Doom
Also:
Ghostbusters II - largest fall from grace for a sequel (including Indiana Jones)
*The River's Edge - this film made me loathe Crispin Glover to this very day
*The Cook, the Thief, his Wife and her Lover - artsy fartsy crap with colored filters
*Drop Dead Fred - just plain retarded!
* these movies represent my Triumvirate of Evil
Films you can't bear - Bluesman Mike Lindner - 05-30-2005
Lisa Wrote:Maggers mentioned this on another thread and I thought it was worth pursuing. In her words:
Here's my list:
1. THE MATRIX. That's right, I said THE MATRIX. A movie that managed to be boring, confusing, pretentious, corny, embarrassing, and highly fucking unlikely--all at the same time.
2. THE ENGLISH PATIENT. I was actually angry that I sat through the whole thing. Dull and duller.
3. AFFLICTION. Nothing "wrong" with this one. Acting, writing, directing are all excellent. But it is deliberate, disturbing, and harrowlingly realistic. So much so that it ceases to be entertainment and becomes difficult or impossible to watch more than once.
4. TITANIC. "Rose!" "Jack!" "Rose!" "Jack!"
5. MOULIN ROUGE. This film gave me motion sickness. I'm not kidding.
6. MEET JOE BLACK. I almost killed myself after I watched this, just so I wouldn't have to "meet Joe Black" before I die. Most boring romance EVER.
7. FALLEN. Way overrated. All the plot elements were done before and better. And the ending is dumb.
8. DANGEROUS LIAISONS. I just can't get into John Malkovich and Glenn Close as desirable lovers. Sorry.
9. STEPMOM. Why does anyone like this movie? I don't understaaaaaaaaaand. (That was in my best "stepwhine" voice.)
10. THE PILLOW BOOK. Huh? Wha?? Ummmm. Peter Greenaway is a weirdo.
Lisa
Well, Lisa, I'm a big-time Stanley Kubrick hombre, but I must confide that BARRY LYNDON bored me to the scowling fidgits. There. I said it. And I'm glad.
Films you can't bear - Lisa - 05-30-2005
Bluesman Mike Lindner Wrote:Well, Lisa, I'm a big-time Stanley Kubrick hombre, but I must confide that BARRY LYNDON bored me to the scowling fidgits. There. I said it. And I'm glad.
My ex feels the same way about BARRY LYNDON and he's a huge Kubrick fan. I've seen parts of it but I'm not sure I've ever sat through the whole thing, so I couldn't add it to my list.
Lisa
P.S. -- Jimbo, the movies don't count if they're universally recognized as bad.
So I don't think Ghostbusters 2 and Drop Dead Fred really count (I agree that they're terrible, though!).
Films you can't bear - Scott Miller - 05-30-2005
Lisa Wrote:1. THE MATRIX. That's right, I said THE MATRIX. A movie that managed to be boring, confusing, pretentious, corny, embarrassing, and highly fucking unlikely--all at the same time.
I couldn't agree more, not much besides an interesting premise.
I must think on this because there are so many, but off the top of my head I can think of a couple of directors whose movies garner both critical and audience praise that I find unwarranted: Ridley Scott and Barry Sonnenfeld.
From Scott I find Thelma and Louise, Black Hawk Down, Gladiator, Hannibal, Black Rain, and 1492 overrated.
From Sonnenfeld my list is both Men In Blacks, Addams Family, Get Shorty, and Wild West.
Films you can't bear - Maggers - 05-30-2005
Lisa,
Thanks for getting this going. I had a good idea!
Revenge of the Sith - yawn
All of the Star Wars movies - except for the first because it was so different, tongue in check and enjoyable
All of the Matrix movies - except for the first one during those now common fly-through-the-air-jump-to-avoid-one-thousand-bullets scenes. They were remarkable to see for the first time.
The English Patient - The book was also difficult to get through. It's beautifully written, just slow as molasses. I wondered how they would fare with the movie based on this difficult book. Well, they didn't do too well.
The Aviator
The Age of Innocence
Chariots of Fire
There are more. I shall return.
Films you can't bear - jimbow8 - 05-30-2005
Lisa Wrote:P.S. -- Jimbo, the movies don't count if they're universally recognized as bad.I misunderstood. Ok, then the Graduate.
2001: A Space Odyssey. - It's not that I don't like it, I just don't get it. It's like the writer was on a bad acid trip.
Films you can't bear - Maggers - 05-30-2005
Most of these were nominated for best picture but I did not like ‘em:
A.I. (not nominated, thank goodness)
Forest Gump
The Towering Inferno
The Goodbye Girl
The Turning Point
Coming Home
Reds
Terms of Endearment
The Color Purple
Remains of the Day
Four Weddings and a Funeral – I don’t care for weddings; I do like funerals. Should have been 3 funerals and a wedding and I’d have done better with it.
Scent of a Woman
As Good As It Gets
Moulin Rouge
Chicago
Here’s an addendum to the “Movies I Can’t Bear List.” It’s “Movies that are good for one viewing only.” By that I mean, for whatever reason, I’ve never been able to make myself sit through them again. I may have thought they were fine when I saw them, might even have liked them a lot, but just could not watch them again.
Movies that are good for one viewing only:
Dances With Wolves – just not interested in seeing it again
Seven – want to see it again but it’s too upsetting
Born on the 4th of July
The Crying Game – loved it, but knew what the ending would be as soon as I saw the questionable character. So the ending was not the shock for me that it was for many others.
More to come on both lists. Maybe I'll start a thread with the one viewing list.
Films you can't bear - Maggers - 05-30-2005
jimbow8 Wrote:2001: A Space Odyssey. - It's not that I don't like it, I just don't get it. It's like the writer was on a bad acid trip.
Ahh, but it was 1968, Jim. Everyone was on an acid trip. Life was an acid trip. Assassinations happening right and left, a war that should never have begun, protests, protests, protests...my oh my ...those were the days.
The screenplay was written by Kubrick and Arthur C. Clarke (*curtsies in homage to a favorite writer*), based on the book by Clarke.
"2001" was an unbelievably cool movie, though a little spacey, you should pardon the pun.
Did you read the book?
Films you can't bear - Lisa - 05-30-2005
Jimbo, I agree with you on 2001. I did read the book and thought it was a bit better. Still weird but not on the level of the movie, and more understandable.
Lisa